Add More Horsepower!

Now, as the second post, we’ll go over the hideous and ugly stuff from this year’s IIMS. Starting with this:

The Foton. Yes, it is yet another Chinese brand. It looks like the Mitsubishi Colt but slightly abnormal, it’s highly chromed, and it is named after Starfleet’s weaponry.

Not that we mind with this mild modification, but…

Do you think this is necessary? The hood is not gonna fly anytime soon, you know…

This is sad, sad Honda Jazz. Why, you say? Simple. Because it’s not a Lamborghini.

And if you think that’s already bad, this one is even worse. Why?

Because it’s so called hydraulic or pneumatic or whatever they use in there, doesn’t really let you to step on the gas pedal. Riceboy’s aesthetics 101… Looks first, think later.

And to sum it all, Honda has this all eco-friendly theme going on, and guess what kind of plant they used to promote it…

Yes… Of all plants, they used weed.

In any car show, there must be at least one poser that thinks he owned a real deal race car. Well, guess who made this…

Straight on, brother! None other than the dude himself. How ya doin’, mate? What version is your car now at?

And to add the ugliness at its best, the interior is covered with snake skin. Oh, dear Lord…

I don’t care if this is just a show car, it is sure ugly as hell. What is with these guys and chrome stickers?

Venom is probably the epitome of car entertainment dumbness. They’re probably the only retards to use a fake Hummer to promote their products.

As for this rim… Well, if you can’t get the real deal, you can always buy the fake one. After all, “Apapun mobilnya, velgnya kan harus Fabulous…”

This is the latest innovation in Daihatsu Astra’s R&D, the racing-styled Daihatsu Xenia…

That comes with a fully functional external brochure holder.

Now, if you ever wondered how riceboys got their stupid inspirations from, we have a set of pictures to explain them all. Starting with this one:

This, is called “Cool Design”, a design by Gaut Widjanarko, a Product Design student from ITS Surabaya. Let me cite his explanation for you.

“Desain innova sudah bagus, sehingga desain yang saya buat hanyalah menciptakan kesan, citarasa baru untuk innova. KONSEP DASARNYA ADALAH MENYAMARKAN GARIS LENGKUNG, SUDUT ROUNDED DENGAN MENAMBAHKAN LEBIH BANYAK GARIS LURUS, TEGAS, DAN BEBERAPA SUDUT TAJAM.

And hence… He created the next generation Dadones. Here’s another one:

A new inspirational design for you who really really, and I mean REALLY love ALTOs…

Or that blasted Livina X-Gear, but doesn’t really want to shell out more money to buy it…

But when it goes to the Anak Selatan club… Behold…

The inspirations for the elegant Innova. Yeah, yeah, sure…

There is actually the Hyundai Accent coupe. But it’s certainly not this one. I just really don’t get people who converted their 5-door sedans to 3-door coupes. Since the process would probably cost the same, why not get a second-hand Estilo or Nova? And since these bozos are hardly poor people, why not get a REAL coupe?

Facts:
Hyundai Accent, unknown license plate, unknown location.
Thanks to AES for the photo. 

Those are very gruesome images to look at. I don’t know what this guy is thinking, he must’ve crash-landed on his head after a 100-feet drop. But you got to give the dude a credit on trying so badly to get himself a Skyline… Or something that looked like it… But wouldn’t it be cheaper if you buy, say, something else that looked a lot less abnormal?

BTW, those front fenders are just way too ridiculous for us to comprehend, don’t you think?

Facts:
Mazda MX-6, B 2355 PJ, near Merak Tolls entrance.
Thanks to TJ for the photos.

How do you make an E36 to look, say, 10 years younger? Well just slab on an E60 fascia, of course! That’s what you call the German Face Job. Isn’t an E60 a 5 series and E36 a 3 series? Yes they are, but don’t worry, everything will eventually pull through. Does it actually make a BMW younger? Well… No.

Facts:
BMW 3 Series, unknown license plate, Diponegoro, Salatiga.
Thanks to DM for the photo.

At first glance, okay, maybe the dude really got a turbo under the hood. The car looks mean enough, and it sure look nice enough with the Gran Turismo-esque trim.

It also has the original (or at least it seems like one) body graphic for tuned Suzukis…

But then, we came across to the disc brakes… Hmm, there’s something fishy about the color… Stock red? Hmm… And I also doubt that a sports enthusiast would pick GT Radial over something better like Bridgestone or Pirelli, perhaps?

And we nailed the bastard! Disc brakes without calipers? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! You can sure tricked your grandma on this one, butthead, but not us.

Facts:
Suzuki Karimun, DK 1346 CI, Mall Bali Galeria parking area.
Thanks to BJL for the detailed photos.