Add More Horsepower!

When Jalopnik did a post on Padang angkots some time ago, we were excited that finally someone did it. But those were angkots, and we have our reasons why we don’t mainly post angkots in our blog. What they didn’t cover is how Padang riceboys are doing, and therefore, feast your eyes:

Because just like when Mercedes Benz did it, a single wiper blade is better than two.

We don’t usually post show cars here, but this dude deserves a good spot here for his questionable sexual orientation.

And I seriously don’t know what’s going on here. This car feels like Twilight Zone.

Facts:
Mitsubishi Lancer, B 70 MY, somewhere in Padang.
Toyota Celica, B 18 IG, Padang Auto Show.
Toyota Yaris, BA 117 DO, somewhere in Padang.
Thanks to M for the photos.

So what does today’s gays think of besides homogenous sex (euwwhhh)? The color pink, of course!

This is pink.

This is also pink.

This is pink with a bit more creative touch.

This is pink slash something. Well, not so pink, but it’ll do.

As for this… Well, this guy is just plain gay, I guess. And yes, the photos and edits were done by the owner, the Surya Paloh beard fan.

Facts:
Suzuki Baleno, unknown license plate, Mall Cilegon parking area. (dos)
Honda Civic, B 8184 IP, somewhere in BSD. (dos)
Toyota Yaris, D 1779 HV, somewher in Kebon Jeruk. (DW)
Honda Accord, unknown license plate, somewhere in Pondok Indah. (VR)
Suzuki Swift, unknown license, unknown location. (A)

As if the photo needs an explanation. It is true when they say a picture speaks a thousand words.

Facts:
Suzuki Swift, B 8666 DG, Tangerang Tolls.
Thanks to DW for the photo.

2008 has passed and some asked us what are the trends of this year’s rice culture. Well, I can tell you that riceboys don’t seem to have the brain power to produce something different than what you see in the Fast and the Furious. But if you insist, well, here they are:

Anime Stickers
Oh yes, you can bet on it. To Jakarta Barat, Pusat, and Utara ricing culture, Rurouni Kenshin still rocks. In fact, the last time I heard, it’s going to be inaugurated as a religion.

Reflective Stickers
Reflective stickers will find their home in riceboys’ hearts in no time this year. See that “The One” sticker? Rumor has it that these stickers could overcome Kenshin in a matter of months. Fake eyelids and meaningless Japanese character stickers will stay as well.

Gays
Yes, as the world is reaching Armageddon, more and more gays are coming out of the closet. This is a proven fact with the choice of colors they picked for their rides.

Camouflage
Chrome is just so yesterday, this year it’s the year of playing guerilla wars no matter where you are. It’s like bringing the Iraq battlefield home.

White Hoods
Just like chromes, black and faux carbon fiber hoods are things of the past. This year, more and more idiots will decorate their cars with white cutting stickers for no reason.

Triple Tailpipes
Last but not least, riceboys will start to ditch twin tailpipes and put in the new trend… THE TRIPIPES.

Facts:
Honda Jazz, B 1640 ON, Lippo Supermall parking area. (B)
Toyota Corolla, B 1195 NZ, Pondok Labu. (B)
Honda Jazz, B 8550 TA, Lippo Supermall parking area. (DW)
Honda City, B 8899 WR, Happy Puppy, Yogyakarta. (totenkopf)
Suzuki Escudo, B 1508 JP, Lippo Supermall parking area. (DW)
Toyota Kijang, B 1708 RX, unknown location. (LMP)
Toyota Camry, B 8413 MR, PIM 2 parking area. (B)
Toyota Kijang, unknown license plate, unknown location. (JRH)

If you’re looking for a gay car community, look no further, Jakarta is known to house lots and lots of gayish car communities. Try strolling down Asia Afrika at night once in a while, or the parking lot of UPH in Karawaci (although technically it isn’t Jakarta), or the parking lot of that famous Public Relations school in Casablanca. I can assure you, you could go home with at least one picture of a shitty pink car, most likely a Japanese car with Mercedes-Benz rims. But we’re going to give you a preview of what those cars are like.

Take this for example. An E30 BMW is definitely one of the best 3-series ever made by BMW (of course until Bangle ruined it all), but what kind of a sane man would color an E30 pink?

If you want the rest of the world to find out that your gay (hence the pink color), what can you do to make it a bit subtle? You know, so people wouldn’t stare at your questionable gender. Easy, just add another exhaust pipe and now people would think that you’re a macho man!

Here’s another example. Sorry for the blocked photo, but you get the idea. Wrong color, wrong body kits, wrong sexual orientation, and the list goes on…

This may not be pink, but again, what normal guy would pick this as a color of his ride and “dadonized” the crap out of it? I tell you, I don’t think a person with a normal XY chromosome would make such a queer decision.

But what if you’re desperate to let people know that you ARE gay? Well, from what we’ve observed, you won’t be needing a pink car to do that…

You just put the word on your license plate, and tell it to the world. This, ladies and gentlemen, outgays all the gay cars we’ve covered so far.

Facts:
BMW 3 Series, B 145 RS, Jalan Panjang. (B)
Honda Jazz, B 7947 PI, unknown location. (Lunatic)
Suzuki Baleno, unknown license plate, KFC Kemang. (DW)
Suzuki Baleno, B 8125 LZ, Arteri Pondok Indah. (B)
Toyota Kijang, BK 9 AY, unknown location. (GP)