Add More Horsepower!

We know that this link has been on our sidebar since we upgraded our blog to version 2.0, but I never wrote about how BBC’s Top Gear inspired us with their sheer reviews on automobiles. Jeremy Clarkson, James May, and Richard Hammond is probably, by far, the best automotive TV show hosts that we’ve ever watched. Clarkson often trash-talked cars that he doesn’t like, but you know what? Unlike you stinkin’ riceboys that are mostly happy if you can reach 60 kph without having butt-aches, he can actually drive. And so as the other two.

Unlike those stupid Indonesian automotive shows that mostly show nothing but riced-up shits with 20-inch wheels and no engine upgrade, I’d go with Top Gear’s reviews any time in any day.

So our point is, we’re quite proud that the probably best TV auto show in the world shares the same vision with us against ricers. Yes, they hate ricers, too. And in case you Indonesian riceboys doesn’t know what Top Gear is, you might probably want to watch BBC once in a while. YouTube can also be a good place to start looking for Top Gear videos. I know you have pay TV or broadband, I mean, how can you not have one while you can cash out millions to fabricate a shitty body kit?

You may ask that most of Top Gear’s challenges are a bit ricey, as they require the hosts to build, let’s say, amphibious cars or stretch limousines. Well, we can say that they are not ricey. It’s a TV challenge, and in almost every challenge, they proved that building a car to become what isn’t supposed to be will most likely a dumb idea. And trust me, even with all the troubles they often got themselves into, this show is a hundred times better than what you can find on a local TV or any version of Pimp My Ride.

So let me get this straight… If you buy the new Getz, it’ll break your heart and disappoint you? So then, why would I buy one in the first place?

Ontario is threatening that the authorities will seize cars that are proven to be used in illegal street racing, and crunch them down like pancakes. And not only Ontario, California already put the law on the roads. Details are available here and here.

Now the question is, when will laws like these be applied here in Jakarta (at least)? Of course, cars like those found in Ontario and California probably can really go that fast, unlike those shitty riceboys that lurk on the streets of Jakarta. But from the point-of-view of safety and not to mention sore to the eyes? Well if there is such law, I’ll definitely vote! This sure is a good way to teach those riceboys a thing or two.

Thanks to Tongki, we managed to snatch some screenshots of that blasted Indonesian version of Pimp My Ride. These pictures are truly wonderful additions to our previous post.

The opening sequence of the retard show.

This is Ali, the victim. He seems like a nice guy, I felt so sorry for him.

This is Ali’s car. As you can see, is not exactly in top-notch condition…

It has lots of rust, a hell lot of rust…

In fact it has rust in all the places that you can imagine.

This is the host, he probably just trying to look hip and all, but doesn’t know a shit or two about cars. He probably only knows how to drive them.

Ali’s car has no door handles whatsoever. So if you want to get in the car, the window is your entrance.

These are the gaylords that doesn’t even know how to act. They’re supposed to be the saviors for the car. Supposedly.

This is what Ali’s car have become. An old Kijang with Karimun headlights. And a Grave Digger color scheme.

A closer look to that sorry front end.

This is Reza, one of the gaylords, explaining why he put freaking 18″ rims to an old Kijang, and the wide body kit, AND the “American Van” concept of which he is trying to achieve with this car.

So now, go figure why we are deeply concerned…

I watched that premiere show today. I was shocked. Pimp My Car is exactly what Pimp My Ride is, except that it’s Indonesian, and they have crappy talents.

The show features some sit-com-esque in-betweens of the workshop members, just like those in Pimp My Ride. However, they simply can’t act, they look goofy, they look awful, they are just crap. At least the guys at WCC or whatever workshop after that does the acting better. But let’s not get to that as this is an automotive blog and not a movie critics website. Our concern is how they treat Indonesians that perhaps don’t know a thing or two about cars, take their cars, and “supposedly fix” them so that they look cooler. Well, it’s not cooler, and I wouldn’t call that fixing.

For you who didn’t happen to see the show, let me recap it a bit. Today’s lucky person victim is a college student who has this rusty old Toyota Kijang that doesn’t have door handles, window handles, and has to push the car to get it started. Auto Design, or whatever that workshop is called, apparently helps the guy pimp out his ride by doing:

• Green airbrush flame paintjob
• 18″ rims on 225/40/R18 tyres
• 6 (I think it’s 6) speaker sets along with its sub-woofer, 3 amps, LCD monitors, and a PS2
• New multi-reflector headlights that looks more like a Toyota Bb than a Kijang, along with a new grill
• A widebody add on
• A green/white trim for the interior, simply because the lucky person victim likes soccer

What we’re concerned of, is how do they determined that the car is safe for daily use? How do they lower it? How do they fix the engine? How do they treat the rust before they paint the car? Let me put it like this, if there is rust all over the damn car’s body, would you just simply cover it up with epoxy and have it painted? And I noticed that some parts of the interior’s rust is not even cleaned before they put on those “pimped-out” seats

Well, those are the things that I remember. MTV morons, this is not how you fix people’s cars. And fixing a car is definitely not by filling in its engine with Top-1 at the end of the show. I have an idea, why not fill the thing up with cooking oil? It might perform as well as Top-1.

I really felt sorry for the lucky person victim, they simply didn’t know what happened to their cars.

If you want to watch the show, it’s on Saturdays, 12 PM, Global TV. Today I stood in awe and didn’t get the chance to grab a picture of it or some sort.